March 18- Finding Hope in Discussion Boards

When the hubs and I were first starting TTC, I had no idea what TTC stood for. In fact, I can remember looking articles up on getting off birth control and getting your body baby ready, and seeing different forums where people were talking in what seemed to be a different language. "My DH and I have been TTC and waiting on AF to XYZ." I actually had found a web page that had all the abbreviations and what they mean! At the time, I had thought it seemed crazy that there were so many people were using this jargon that they had cheat sheets out there and couldn't imagine having THAT much trouble getting pregnant to where I was part of a "community." Funny how life likes to throw curve balls. Right between the eyes.

So here it is, months after I found that decoder page and I can officially say I've joined the likes of all those others in the discussion forum world. Granted, I'm not on them every day, but I have made some posts and had some conversations. And I've gotta say, it was the best decision I could've made. Women on them are SO unbelievably nice and supportive and have gone or are going through the same thing! The best part is seeing all the success stories. Where medical articles are all doom and gloom, preaching slim chances and donor eggs, these are ACTUAL women who have had POF and went on to get pregnant naturally. Even better, most of them have done all the same alternative things I'm doing (supplements, TCM/acupuncture, massage, yoga, etc.) and despite their initial prognosis of never being able to have a baby, they did!

One of the most common responses people posted was that I needed to find a better fertility Dr. I had already figured that one out between the success stories I read where women had to find a more positive Dr. who was willing to work with high FSH and supported alternative therapies and the recent email responses I received from my fertility Dr. The last one I sent I had just read some posts about Antral Follicle Count so I asked him what mine was. He responded a few days later with, "It was very low." Well no shit, Sherlock! I pretty much gathered that! I wanted a number. But he made it clear with that stately me that he was done with me. Which I am absolutely fine with that! I need someone who is willing to step up to the plate and try to help me, not blow me off and make me out to be a lost cause! One girl's story was talking about how she was getting her numbers tested every few weeks! And that her FSH was up, down and all over the place. A lot of people also said that FSH is supposed to be taken on Day 3 of your cycle, and since I'm not having a cycle at all I shouldn't hang my hat on that number. My TCM Dr. concurred.

So I have been looking all over my state for a Dr. who will work with High FSHers, but no luck so far. I did keep getting posts that I should go see this Dr. Check in NJ at the Cooper Institute for Reproductive Hormone Disorders. That he has been known to get women pregnant after the had already hit menopause. I researched his office and they do accept out of state patients. You just have to go in for an initial visit and then pay a small fee for him to keep up with you via phone and email. That you have to find a local Dr. that is willing to work in conjunction with them. The good thing is I grew up in Jersey and still have family there only a half hour from the facility. Since I have off in the summer (I'm in the education field) it would be a good time to go. So I wrote a very long and detailed letter and faxed it over to them. They said they received it and would pass it along, but I haven't heard back yet. I'll have to call soon and see what's up. My guess is if all these women are suggesting to go see him, he's probably pretty damn busy!

I also had someone from the Fertility Authority contact me through one of my posts! They are a comprehensive fertility network that helps people find the right fertility Dr. (it's a free service). They asked me to send them the details of my diagnosis in an email. We emailed back and forth with her asking questions and me answering and she is working within the network to find a Dr. best suited for my case. (Which I don't think will be easy in my area, there doesn't seem to be much in the way of High FSH Drs in FL). But just the fact that they contacted me and are trying to help, I think it's pretty awesome.

My suggestion to any of you who are going through this devastating disorder and are needing some positivity sent your way... Check out the forums. Even if you don't join and post, there are a lot of success stories out there. I will say that I'm very glad I joined and have sent a few messages. Especially because I've gotten a lot of ideas, suggestions and help from people where I wouldn't have had I not posted!

Until next time, here are links to some good infertility forums:

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